MY 10 NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS....

1)I will stop eating junk food...m health conscious now..m gona stick 2 drugs and alcohol only now ;)
2)i will take up a new habit..smoking seems good :p
3)I will stop saying LOL,LMAO,HEHE jst fr da sake of it,when thre is nthng 2 laught about wen m chatting
4)i will still boycott facebook(chirkut orkut rox!!!)
5)i will lyk akshay kumar,nd wil not mke fun of his movies,I will watch all his movies nd den I will get help fr mental disorders :P
6)i will read more,its time I move from maxim to playboy :P
7)i will watch iron man 2(MAY 2010,YIPPEEEE!!!!)
8)i wil spend less time on da net…23 hrs 59 mins is gud,1 MIN SYSTM BAND KRNE MN LAGTA HAIN YAR!!!
9)i will nt make fun of da way how Robert pattinson luks,coz I hve been getting THREATS from animal rights,THEY SAY I M DISGUSTNG,how can sum1 b so rude to an animal!!
10)i will continue to fool my blog readers that I will sumday cme up wid a sensibl article ;)

APPy EW Ear 2010!!!

IroN man 2

iROn MAN 2 Trailer Out ..kICKASS bABY!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6Olpjl_IrE

De daNa DAn

Akki has done it agn :-)
da worst muvi evr in the indian film industry is undoubtdly kambakht ishq,but ddd,givz it tuf comptetn,watching de dana dan is evn mre painful than a kick in da balls,trst me ;)
de dana dan is da unoficial sequel to bhagam bhag,whch ws in my opinion a gud muvi,ddd has da sme confusion angle,and trst me i think the actorz,writer and da director wre equaly confusd as to what dey wre doing.
da so cald starz akki,kat,paresh rawal,sunil shitty(oops,shetty ;)),nd an actrez whose name i dnt evn remembr dnt serve da purpose,actrz lyk johny levr nd shakti kapur wre rly gud in sum scenes.bt overall da muvi suckd!!

paisa paisa song was i guez da only usp of da muvi

i WUD RECOMMEND YOU TO WATCH DDD ONLY IF-
1)ur a police officer who is interrogating sum hardcore criminals,mke dem watch dis movie nd dey will admit crimes dey dint even commit,dey will beg u 2 stop da muvi.dis cud be a healthy altrnativ 2 narco tests :P
2)U hav serious brain damage
3)ur da richest guy in da world,lukin for stupid reasons 2 waste ur money

frm ma side its a complete thumbs down,i wud sum up in 4 wrds-

EVEN BLUE WAS BETTER
adios amigos :-)

Da SoNg dAT ToUcHz Ma hEart..Fr Ma Bst bUD....

So no one told you life was gonna be this way
Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's DOA

It's like you're always stuck in second gear
When it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, or even your year

but..

I'll be there for you
When the rain starts to pour
I'll be there for you
Like I've been there before
I'll be there for you
'Cuz you're there for me too...

You're still in bed at ten and work began at eight
You've burned your breakfast so far... things are goin' great

Your mother warned you there'd be days like these
Oh but she didn't tell you when the world has brought
You down to your knees that...

I'll be there for you
When the rain starts to pour
I'll be there for you
Like I've been there before
I'll be there for you
'Cuz you're there for me too...

No one could ever know me
No one could ever see me
Seems you're the only one who knows
What it's like to be me
Someone to face the day with
Make it through all the rest with
Someone I'll always laugh with
Even at my worst I'm best with you, yeah

It's like you're always stuck in second gear
When it hasn't been your day, your week, your month,
or even your year...

I'll be there for you
When the rain starts to pour
I'll be there for you
Like I've been there before
I'll be there for you
'Cuz you're there for me too...

I'll be there for you
I'll be there for you
I'll be there for you
'Cuz you're there for me too...

dEkHo eK CA Ja rAhA haIN....

FoUnd ThIS oN da nET-

Apni Profile ke bojh tale daba jaa raha hai,


Wo dekho ek Chartered Accountant ja raha hai,


Zindagi se hara hua hai,
Par " Balance sheet Tally " karne se haar nahi manata,
Apne excel sheet ki ek ek line ise rati hui hai,
Par aaj kaun se rang ke moje pehne hain, ye nahi janata,
Din par din ek excel file banata ja raha hai

Wo dekho ek Chartered Accountant ja raha hai,

Das hazaar line ki file main error dhoond lete hain lekin,
Majboor dost ki ankhon ki nami dikhayi nahi deti,
PC pe hazaar windows khuli hain,
Par dil ki khidki pe koi dastak sunayi nahi deti,
Satuday-sunday nahata nahi, week days ko naha raha hai,

Wo dekho ek Chartered Accountant ja raha hai,

linking karte karte pata hi nahi chala,
"Excel" ki priority kab maa-baap se high ho gayi,
Kitabon main gulab rakhne wala , cigerette ke dhuyen main kho gaya,
Dil ki zameen se armaanon ki vidayi ho gayi,
Weekends pe daroo peke jo jashna mana raha hai,

Wo dekho ek Chartered Accountant ja raha hai,

Maze lena ho iske to pooch lo,
"Salary Increment" ki party kab dila rahe ho,
Hansi udana ho to pooch lo,
"Leave" pe kab ja rahe ho?
Wo dekho Leave se laute team-mate ki chocolates kha raha hai,

Wo dekho ek Chartered Accountant ja raha hai,

Kharche badh rahe hain,
Baal kam ho rahe hain,
Income Tax ke sitam ho rahe hain,
Lo phir se bus choot gayi, Auto se aa raha hai,

Wo dekho ek Chartered Accountant ja raha hai,

Pizza gale se nahi utarta,
To "Coke" ke sahare nigal liya jata hai,
Office ki "Thali" dekh munh hai bigadta,
Maa ke hath ka wo khana baar roz yaad ata hai,
"Sprout bhel" bani hai phir bhi, free "Evening Snacks" kha raha hai,

Wo dekho ek Chartered Accountant ja raha hai,

Aapne ab tak li hongi bahut si chutikiya,
Chartered Accountant ke jivan ka sach batati ye akhri kuch panktiyan,
Hazaron ki tankhwah wala, company ki karodon ki jeb bharta hai,
Chartered Accountant wahi ban sakta hai, jo lohe ka jigar rakhta hai,
Hum log jee jee ke marte hain , zindagi hai kuch aisi,

Ek fauj ki naukri, doosri Chartered Accountant ki , dono ek jaisi,
Is kavita ka har shabd mere dil ki gehrayi se aa raha hai,

Wo dekho ek Chartered Accountant ja raha hai ..........

MJ-The tHRIlLER is No Mre..

the king of pop,is one wid da universe,u wre and olwz wil be da ultimate popstar,god bless ur soul.RIP
ur soul wil nt rest in heaven,it l ROCK IN HEAVEN!!!

my tribute 2 da mst over-rated star of our tyms...

AkShY kUmR BbY!!!...


1)m tired of seeing dat same old ten rupee haircut of his...
AK has been sporting his receding hairline in tashan,tasveer,CC2C(I luvd dis movie,i l appreciate it in pt.3)n kambakht ishq,dude hvnt u heard of make-overs,stop lawn mowing ur hair

2)Same ol expressions
y does AK alwz hve dat sme ol irritatd luk,lyk sum1 stck a bamboo stick up his ass ;),in da begng it lukd cute,but now akki has overdone it,it isnt funy ny mre,,m tird of him being funny

3)CC2C
chandni chowk 2 china,if u havent heard or watchd dis movie den u r da most sane persn on da face of dis planet,now dis movie is a classic,a "classic not 2 watch" movie,u d rathr contemplte suicide den watch dis movie.if u wnt ur kids to get scard,n ur elders 2 die of nausea and headache,den i d sugst u 2 buy a dvd,nd witnes hell

10 Most kIcKass RoCk sONgS

Boys listen to hip hop and men listen to Rock..
so amigos heres ma definative list on 10 songs that define badassery,definately not in sequential order,but every song has a cult status on its own.m a suckr for guitar riffs and evey song in here has classic piece of guitaring

1.Smells like teen spirit-Nirvana

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dXO3OMGKPpw

kya nolun isske bare mein???dis song gives you nirvana,jst frees your soul,salvation....

n kurt u r god!!!king of guitar riffs

2.Born to be wild-Steppenwolf

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdiWEmTpwCY

if motorbikes had their own country,dis would be there national anthem,classiC rock SONG which is often beleived to have introduced metal

3.Enter Sandman-Metallica

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QP-SIW6iKY

if u ever search da meaning of metallica in da dictionary kickass would be the defination,dis song has the history OF churning out da nastiest lyrics.rock on!!!


4.I disappear-Metallica

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hqod6U6GgXw

Kick ASSSSSSSS


5.Hotel California-Eagles

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h4qEzSz1JSc

classic rock ,one of da most beautiful and meaningful songs ever written


6.Limp Bizkit-Mi2 themesong
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NdpP6ynPbiY

killer guitr riff in da opening

7.Smoke on the water-deep purple

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WX_4FNoto4

guitar abusing to da maximum



8.Stairway to heaven-led zepplin

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BcL---4xQYA

spookiest song ever written,givs me goose bumps,rumoured to be a song praisind da devil wen played backwards


9.Back in black-AC/DC
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tXaZmY52gHM


dis song has attitude written all over it,also used in da hit movie iron man



10.iron man-Black sabbath

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tkLMI8me24


black sabbath are gods of rock,dis song definately lives in da heart of every rock addict

da list can go on and on....so do temme which rock song is ur fav ;-)
adios!!!

PAPPU DOESnt Vote but BlOGs sAala...

today is da D-day for indian politics as voting is taking place in many imprtnt places in da country,a lot of ma friends,relatives have votd,and feel gr8 abt it, and m being treated like an untouchable for not"excercising"my right.ppl find it hard 2 swallow wen i say dat i dont like 2 vote,i just dnt blve in da system,i mean m nt anti-democracy or smthng,but m jus anti-votng.
statistically speakng 60-70% of educated indians dont vote,da majority of voters are from the lower incme group,rural ppl,or the upper class.ppl are bought in rural places,loaded in2 trucks and brought 2 votng booths fr a packet of biryani and liquor,dis is a big slap on the indian political system, the upper class votes becz dey pretend to be patriotic,seeing the amount of tax evasion dese rich ppl do,i know how patriotic dese guyz are
now letz talk abt da sufrng clas-da middle clas,it isnt suprising dat dey dnt vote coz dey are not at al botherd,whovr cms in power wil ultimatly screw da midle clas.
i sympathise wid da midle clas and partly agree wid dem,being a young midle clas indian myslf,i noe hw mch da inflation and tax policies hurt.bt i urge 2dayz youth to be proactive,vote if you like,but dnt mke patriotism a once in 5yr event,do smthng directly fr ur country,join an ngo,help poor children,spnd sum tme in old age homes
vote for youngsters in politics,nt da ones with a family background in politics :-p,cooperate wid young ias and ips,dont vote jus becoz ul get a discount at a particular garment shop,vote if u want 2,but dont waste time putng your hopes on sum 60+oldie.

Whos dA rat???

fakeiplplayer.blogspot.com-awesumm man,kick ass!!!!

IPL vs PCD

last week 2 thngs pissed me off, numero uno the IPL,and second the pussy cat dolls,da 1st one for killing da classiness of a sport,and da secnd one for ripping apart a shitty song.m nt a cricket buff but fr me a cricket is a gentlemen s game,one days or test cricket,50 overs per side is da thng,we dnt ned scantily clad women to enjoy a sixer or a four,20-20 is da new fad,wat nxt,toss da coin nd bdecide hus gonna win??
pussy cat doll's "jai whoe",(spelling mistake intended),coz dats wat it sounds like,i mean wat was dat, pure bull shit.

chlo guyz,u njoy ipl.da only gud thng abt ipl is less traffic in da eveningzz..byyee

ItZ FiNger lIcKiN gOOd ;-)

Sry mumbaikars n dere pav bhajjis , bt dilli is the stret food capitl of da country,itz a paradise fr junk food luvrs like me,i mean who dsnt like gol gappas or da hot n spicy kacchoris near sheikh sarai,da yummy parathas of paranthe walli gali.

Saddi dilli knows how to please ur gastronomic temptations, I ve sen guys getng dwn frm dere sedans n rikshaw wallas enjoyng der chowmein 2 gthr,itz nt luv,nor da universl brotherhood ,its gud food dat brings ppl 2gthr…

Our city has adopted 2 evry type of cuisine,be it American or Chinese, u cn hve delicious Chinese food at tibet markt,n da roadside momos taste 2 gud…nothing beatz dose jalebies at ur neighborhood halwai n dose tasty rolls at venky.u cn hve a burgr at 5rs,n u cnt cl urslf diliwalla if u hvnt ben 2 paranthewali galli, or da chaat bhandar at upsc.n it wont burn a hole at ur pokt

Go 2 khalsa nd u l c da wrld famous magi walla,hus made a foRtune by making magi n selling it to du students!!!

I recently had delicious halwa at ghante walla halwai,whch is at chandni chowk , n has ben fr mre dan 400 yrs.i heard abt a plce at chndni chowk dat sells gol guppa wid 12 varieties f watr,well gotta chk dat out soon!!

Deres food fr evry 1 , I mean m a veggie,nd I cn hve al delicious veggie street foods,widout thnkng twice,sme fr non veggies who swear by der karims.

no matr how desi mc donalds n kfc try 2 bcme,betaa u cn beat da street fud...i heard dat street fud shops wud be closd becoz f common wealth,in ordr 2 create a "cleanr delhi",itz a prt f our heritge,y dont dey break da old monumntz den...they luk ugly, nd dnt mke dilli luk betr...

Bt da wrd of caution is if u hve junk food mke sure itz a hygienic plce,nd da food is servd hot…n nvr drnk watr,alwz cAry minrl watr or kam chalao wid a cold drnk

Dilli luvz wat it does, n does it luv itz fud??hell yeah!!

rOti,kAPdA,MakaN,OrKuT...

We live by it,we swear by it,Our generation hs seen mobiles,pcs,internet,lcd’s blah blah blah, but only 5 lettrs define our generation O R K U T,the opium of our generation, the concept dat tuk da wrld by storm-social netwrkng n da pioneer among dem was our pyara lil chirkut….
Orkut has bcme an integral prt of our lives,I mean I m addictd to orkut,nd millions of young Indians like me are….nd itz a gr8 way to meet n interact wid new n intrestng ppl.dese days guyz ask how to add ech odr on orkt bfre evn xchngng his,helozzz,wats ur name n khana khake jaanassss.
Da fny thng is a lot f my friends chk a girl is single or committed , n den add her,dude agar who 4 bachho ki maa bi ho toh kya farak pdta hain..she isn’t gonna cme out n kiss u.
i wont discuss the downside of orkuttin I mean da fake profiles,hacking nd stuff,jus a piece f advice kep changing ur paswrdz and nevr trust ppl on orkt.n nevr let it take ovr ur life,dnt spnd countless hourz on it, wel I spend ma countlz hrs on it :-P

Y DIlii 6 suckd ....

Don’t get me wrong,I luvd dilli 6,it’s a rly gud movie 2 watch n I rly admire rakesh mehra , hes one f dose few sensible directors lft in our country.but m nt dat impresd with the depiction of saddi dilli in the movie….
I just don’t get it I mean,is chandni chowk the only god damn place in the world that shows the real dilli, I mean I v ben 2 paranthewali gali a thousand times,and frankly I love old delhi,but I don’t see the old world charm nymre,I don’t see qawalli wallas singing , nor those happy go lucky Punjabi families shown in dilli 6,stand in those crowded lanes for some time n u l see a couple on their scooter wid their pappus and pinkys addressing your mothers and sisters and telng u 2 mke way.spend some time in dilli 6 and u l realize how commercialized the walled city has become...
When you enter chandni chowk,the first thing you see is Mc.Donalds,I mean,wake up guyz,or rathr move on…..

i read an article in the newspaper junior b sed m a dilliwalla, “I luv dilli coz I studied ma 4th grade in a delhi school”.dude,hve u lost ur mind???itz like MY PLANE FLEW OVR DELHI ONCE AND HENCE M A DILLIWALLA,ur a mumbaikar dude,b dat way,dnt say stupid thngs 2 promote your movie…

But I guess itz a movie and thingz hve 2 b dramatized….1 more thng to mr.mehra ..dilli is not a Punjabi city…itz a cosmopolitan goddamit,itz not about fat Punjabi ladies having a laugh nd making pickles on rooftops.its a city dats evolving evry secnd,women r working nw,ppl don’t give a damn abt anything nw,ppl are ruthless,evn in dilli 6....


A lot of south Indians,bongs,ppl frm the north east,biharis,etccc have contributed a lot to this city both economically and socially ,so please wake up.show us 2,we v livd here for generations and we r 1000%dilliwalas…
But guys dilli 6 rockd,becoz it hd a mesg,itz al abt luv ppl,spread luv nt war…n b a dill walla….b a dilli walla :-)

d.E.s.T.I.N.y

As i sip my cup of coffee and ponder over all dose stupid questions that come around in my mind,deres a sadabahar one,what is destiny???is it true???can lines on our hands really determine our lives??
we all know paul cohelo s alchemist and "the universe conspires for it" theory, if it was so den y y were not the thousand of jews saved in concentration camps,when they prayed to god to get saved????,y didnt the universe"conspire"anythng??? bullshit....m rly amazed y ppl find alchemist so inspiring,i mean, heres a book which tells da guy to follow some stupid star and prophecies to achieve your destiny... if there is something called destiny,n we r supposed to get watevr is pre -decided for us,den y take da pain of following the "hints",reading the YOUR FATE TODAY columns in newspapers,and listening to Bejan daruwallas,nd battliwalas and chaddiwallas...it wont mke any difference

i jus believe in myself, my abilities to succeed in life,u make ur own destiny,u can achieve nythng u want,provided u work in a smart way,if u blame ur failures in life on destiny,u wont learn a thing abt ur weaknesses and you cant strike back.destiny demotivates you than inspiring to achieve in live

i guess wen m 85 yr old man,rotting away sumwre in a cornr alotted by the losers i spawned,sitting on a wheelchair,pissing in ma pants,thinking how screwed up ma life is,n lukng bck,mayb den i l tke a stand on destiny,whether i shud believe it or not...bt as of nw i trust michelle jean nidtech bhai- '
"it's choice--not chance--that determines your destiny"


adios amigos!!!

ITT BEGINS :-(

TIME:6.45 AM,PLACE:INSTITUTE OF CA’S OF INDIA,VISHWAS NAGAR BRANCH
THE REASON: INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY TORTURE (TRAINING :-P)
Here I am standing outside my classroom where ca students are taught everything about computers that they already know or things that they l nvr use in their lives…I guess that’s very common in my course now….
I guess I love observing people,its my favorite pass time, people just love staring at random objects when they are in a new environment,sizing other ppl,thinking about ways to break the ice,to start talking to that cute looking gal…fantasizing about their lives….

I was busy listening to songs when a big guy comes up to me and says bhayya yahan IT ki clas ke liye aaye ho???,I thought no dude we are from the international federation of pav bhajji wallas and we are looking for a guy to endorse our products,nyways I sed haan bhayya..

People sometimes ask you the questions that have an obvious answer,and that drives me nuts..like a relative of mine met me after 10 years and said kitna badda ho gaya hain shiva,I thot no dude m just on steroids,and it works gr88,would you like to try some???

LIFE IS SO INSANE……


BEST OF LUCK TO ALL THOSE GIVING BOARDS :-D(go n study!!!:-@)
p.s.do thank me for this ;-)

WeLcoME

Here I am,sitting on a lousy sunday afternoon,trying to "enjoy"my weekend,trying to figure out my life,getting even more confused in the process...gotta do something,something that excites me..EUREKA!!!! let me move ma lazy ass to my pc and lemme make a blog...hmm..sounds gud...lets do it....opened blogger..hmm....wat should i name my blog...bricks and brats..brinjals and pumpkins????:-P,hw about ash and thunder??sounds gud...yeah so i made an account,now what??:-(